Communication and Negotiation

Necessary Life Skills (within and without BDSM)


In order to be successful in any type of relationship, communication is essential. Negotiation is a special communication skill set.

The following are writings that fall under that general description (though they may also be listed elsewhere.)


  • Let’s Talk About S.E.C.S., Baby! (Ep. 39)
    Let’s Talk About S.E.C.S., Baby! I think that we can all agree that sex education in many countries, including the USA and Canada, is woefully lacking. Most high school curricula either focus on abstinence practices or are restricted to the […]
  • Touch – The non-sexual kind
    Hold me close Touch. It is a human need and one that many people are craving. We live in the digital age. For many people, an average day involves going to work, then returning home. The bulk of their interactions with friends and family is on-line. […]
  • Sexual Incompatibility is Survivable
    My Successful Sexless Marriage I have been married for 25 years. On July 5, 2017, my husband and I will be celebrating our 25th wedding anniversary and we have a happy, healthy sexless marriage. Sexual Incompatibility – we have that in spades. […]
  • Retroactively withdrawing consent
    The morning after; A bitter pill, the bitter truth The idea of retroactively withdrawing consent arose during an episode of The Third Rail on which I was the guest. The episode aired on May 1, 2016. We were talking about unconscious sex (which is a […]
  • I don’t think that means what you think it means; or, words have meaning
    Words mean something Meaning: noun What is meant by a word, text, concept, or action (Oxford Dictionary) We live in this wonderful culture of freedom. Personal freedom, personal expression, they are wonderful things. I love that I can be myself, I […]
  • Respect is earned: I can call you Sir?
    I can call you “Sir”, you say? Are you allowing me to call you Sir? How gracious of you! Really! I just met you but you are being kind enough to grant me a short-cut to a large portion of the process of building relationships, trust and […]
  • The 4Cs of BDSM (Episode 13)
    From “SSC” and “RACK” to the “4Cs”: Introducing a new Framework for Negotiating BDSM Participation. The existing models don’t quite do it. Within the BDSM community, we use phrases like “safe, sane and […]
  • Can we stop with the “SSC” already? Please?
    Is it time to retire “SSC”? I think so. There is a prevailing tendency within our community to look at milder BDSM activities as Safe, Sane, Consensual (SSC) and the rougher/tougher practices as Risk Aware Consensual Kink (RACK). I have […]
  • Tell Me A Story (Episode 6)
    Tell Me A Story Imagine that you are planning on having a scene with someone. What elements are you considering? Your toys? Your techniques? Where and when? Perhaps, you are contemplating adding psychological elements to your play. These are all […]
  • Narcissism, The Current N-Word (Episode 2)
    Narcissism: The current N-Word It probably isn’t the one you are thinking. There is a new n-word that has risen through the ranks to be the ultimate slur … narcissist. But, is being narcissistic really the evil that it is portrayed to be? Are […]

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Camille Beaujolie
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Camille Beaujolie

On-Air Personality at Stereo-Typed on TPOK Radio
Host of Stereo-Typed on TPOK Radio, an educational, research-based internet radio show/podcast that seeks to challenge beliefs about and within the Alternative Sexuality cultures. Contributor to the TPOK Monthly newsletter.
Camille Beaujolie
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References   [ + ]

1. I’ve tried, it doesn’t work.
2. I really wish I could find it now, it was a brilliant piece if I do say so myself
3. Now an ex-partner because of situations like this
4. they were all men at that time
5. albeit somewhat awkward
6. well, they might seem fucked-up to anyone outside of my brain or the scene
7. okay, it was actually several small bloody cuts
8. This is another thing that needs to be taught, it seems. Too many are affording trust without getting to know the person!